Words of Encouragement

 What a bleak time we are living through. There are so many layers of despair all around us. As I have written previously, I have been dealing with the loss of my parents. Mom's illness and death occurred in the early stages of the pandemic - a word that I had not paid attention to, before we were in the middle of one. We have all suffered, in unforeseen ways, over these past two years. 

Just as we were emerging from this dark period, Ottawa and many parts of Canada were subjected to the occupation of our city and other vital areas. Having to witness the selfish behaviour of the occupiers was a rude introduction to this section of Canadian society. 

Just when we finally got our city back, Russia invaded Ukraine, plunging us all into another dark hole.  The images we are now seeing are unbelievable. It is difficult to understand how one person can be responsible for so much destruction and profound sorrow. I am grateful that my dear parents are not alive to see how the world has turned backwards. 

What to do? How can we go about our days, knowing that so many are living in fear and misery? There are many agencies, working in Ukraine, looking for our donations.  Our local Ukranian Church is starting to accept donations of various items to send to Ukraine so I bought a few things this afternoon. As I put some boxes of baby food pouches into my cart I was overcome with sadness, wondering who might eat them - babies, or toddlers, children or even desperate adults? 

While standing in line for a cashier, I became aware of a disgruntled customer at an adjacent cash. A middle-aged man was berating a cashier because there were no No Name peanuts available in the store. He had a rain check for that brand and he was ticked off there were none available. She explained they were having trouble getting them  and he went on and on, about how was he going to use his rain check! The poor cashier was extremely patient with him. When he finally left, another customer and I talked to her about his behaviour and  empathized with her.  

The more I thought about it, afterwards, the more I wished I had told him off, instead of waiting to speak after he left. I wish I had told him to look at the images from Ukraine and then complain, only if he had a real problem. But I didn't. That's what we do with bullies, don't we? We let them talk. We let them have their way. That's what we did in Ottawa for three weeks. We let the occupiers, those bullies,  take over our city and treat our special places with complete disrespect. I'm sick and tired of bullies, like Trump and Putin. 

I was in a pretty foul mood until I heard an interview on CBC radio's All In A Day with Alan Neal. He was interviewing Andrew Hon, the Associate Musical Director with the Ottawa Choral Society. On Sunday they will perform a piece called Annelies, which is a musical evocation of the diary of Anne Frank.

As I listened to Mr. Hon, it seemed he was giving me the pep talk that I needed, to keep on going, to not give in to anger and despair. Here is some of what he said about the message of Annelies:

"My hope is that, as we contemplate the words of Anne Frank, that we realize, her diary is a reminder of how the human spirit can prevail,  even during the darkest of days. ...It's about the human spirit and the human condition and how we cope with isolation and adversity in life...We can still have some hope in how we live our life....I want the audience to walk out of the concert hall, feeling inspired with how to treat people....We are so capable of hurting each other, especially people who are different.....We are also capable of loving and caring for each other. That is the core message of this piece."

Thank you Andrew Hon. I needed to hear you today.

The last word

My last words about the dreadful situation in Ottawa are not mine at all. They belong to Bob Rae, who tweeted, 

" A truck is not a speech. A horn is not a voice. An occupation is not a protest. A blockade is not freedom, it blocks the liberty of all. A demand to overthrow a government is not a dialogue. The expression of hatred is not a difference of opinion. A lie is not the truth."

The Madness Continues

Okay, so call me naive. On January 30th, I wrote a fairly calm piece, expressing my total confidence in various levels of government and the many police forces in the Ottawa Gatineau area. I truly believed that they would ensure a safe and quick end to the protest  here in Ottawa.  I just assumed that they were all working together. Was I ever wrong ! Just this past Saturday, February 12th, there was an announcement that an integrated command centre was being set up, bringing together local police with the Ontario Provincial Police and the RCMP. Really ?! On the third weekend of protests you tell the citizens of Ottawa that you are setting up this joint desk? Why didn't you set that up before the protesters even arrived here? 

As if God would condone treating their fellow citizens in this abusive manner!

The news over the past week has been incredible. The province has rightly declared a state of emergency.   With the lack of both leadership and basic law enforcement, all kinds of people felt it necessary to take action of their own. A twenty-one year old woman launched a court injunction to stop the constant blaring of trucks,  the Ottawa mayor did some of his own negotiating with truckers, to remove their trucks from residential streets, regular citizens launched counter protests and prevented some protesters from going downtown. 

On February 14th, for the first time, Trudeau looked like he was truly interested in helping to stop this insanity. Bring on the Emergencies Act ! Do something, anything. Today while out for a walk in our area, we ran into a few neighbours and they all expressed the same opinion -  Ottawa has been failed by all levels of government . The people of Ottawa are sick and tired of squabbling among various elected officials. We need a coordinated effort. Yesterday, for better or worse, our police chief has resigned. Will that help matters ? 

There's so much to read on the current situation.   From yesterday's Ottawa Citizen, here are a couple of pieces to consider: Click here to read local writer Kelly Egan's assessment of the situation. Click here to read yesterday's editorial in the Ottawa Citizen.

There are many days that I can't believe the times we are living in. For so many reasons, this is a depressing era. My only consolation is that our grandchildren are young enough that we can still try to protect them from the very harsh realities of the current situation. We'll spend this coming family day weekend with our seven and nine year old grandkids. They're pretty big on rules. They know you can get a ticket if you break the law. They give me heck if I start to back the car out of the driveway, while still buckling up my seatbelt. They know we should all wear helmets when we ride our bikes. They trust that police officers are there to assist  them if they need help. 

I want them to continue to have faith and trust that police forces and government officials are there to take care of all of us. This weekend we'll play with them and if we watch television at all, we'll turn off the news and watch the Olympics instead. The Olympics aren't perfect but it's a good escape from this ongoing siege. 

What now?

 I wrote my last post on Sunday evening. By Monday morning I was furious. That was after I listened to several radio interviews, with folks affected by this occupation.  Tomorrow is Friday - a whole week of this unprecedented, outrageous situation. Tonight's At Issue panel (CBC ) was particularly vehement in their condemnation of the Conservative Party's reaction to the situation. Of course I have no idea how this should be resolved. All I know is that the personal stories that I have heard on the radio this week have been absolutely heartbreaking. Councillor Diane Deans, the head of Ottawa's Police Services Board apologized to the people who live and work in the downtown core  for the "living hell" they are enduring.  Alex Munter, the CEO of CHEO, was tweeting information in the mornings - traffic tips -  to advise hospital workers that if they showed their hospital ID at the closed Chaudiere Bridge, they would be allowed to use that bridge to cross from Quebec to Ottawa, to get into their shifts at the hospitals. That's so they could avoid the hours long delays on the other bridges. 

Today, as I drove around my own neighbourhood I was struck by the politeness of my fellow drivers. We still have a lot of very large snowbanks after our last storm, making it difficult for two cars to pass each other. So we patiently wait and duck into a laneway and let the other guy go first. It happens all the time. Same thing on the sidewalks. Often, when you are walking along, people will cross to the other side of the street or pull over into a lane way to let the other pedestrian walk by- because  of Covid concerns, That's the kind of city we are . Ottawans are, for the most part, polite, kind and patient. That's why we are so appalled at the extreme rudeness and selfishness of the thugs who have invaded our city. 

This is madness. 

Thanks to Ottawa Police

What a weekend in Ottawa!  Thank goodness we have been able to rely on several police forces to protect our city.

It's a privilege to live in Canada's capital. We can go skating on the Rideau Canal, visit the national museums, and attend shows at The National Arts Centre. Living here makes it easy for us to celebrate special occasions, whether that means going to the National War Memorial on Remembrance Day or to the grounds of Rideau Hall when a new government is sworn in. These are our country's special places and we're grateful to have easy access to them.

Parliament Hill is our gathering place, whether it's for Canada Day festivities or other more sombre events. I remember going to the lying-in-state for John Diefenbaker and  then being there years later, with throngs of people, to pay respects to Pierre Trudeau. In the summer, we always take out of town visitors to see the Sound and Light show.  Protests are a part of life in Ottawa and we've been to many.  Last fall we went to the Hill to view the sad displays after the Kamloops graves were discovered. 

So, we're used to Parliament Hill being the place where citizens express their triumphs, tragedies and frustrations. However, this weekend's protest is something altogether different than anything we've ever witnessed. Someone on the radio this afternoon said that some of this weekend's visitors clearly did not understand the significance of some of our nation's capitals  monuments, like the Tomb of the Unknown Solider and the statue of Terry Fox. Susan Delacourt stated on CBC Radio that this was like a "national temper tantrum". 

It feels like our city is being held hostage. No one really knows when this is going to end.  Roads are closed, most of the interprovincial bridges are closed, the downtown shopping mall (Rideau Centre) was forced to close because of unmasked demonstrators, and a soup kitchen felt harassed into providing meals to protesters. How is the city going to get back to business tomorrow? As I write this (10 pm Sunday) school boards are considering keeping some schools closed. After so many school closures, some parents may find out tomorrow morning that there is no school ?!

My sister lives close to a parkway where trucks parked all night. Last evening an unmasked protestor came to her door, asking for access to bathrooms and information about restaurants. The protester was told that many of the neighbourhood restaurants were closed - because of the truck convoys being nearby. My sister was awakened early this morning by the steady blaring of truck horns. Pity the residents of downtown Ottawa, listening to that blaring, all weekend.

Over the past couple of years we have heard demands to de-fund the police. Really? What would we have done this weekend, without a heavy police presence? We were told to stay away from the centre of the city. What could we do except remain in our neighbourhoods, hope that the demonstrations would remain peaceful and leave it all in the hands of the police? 

This afternoon we went cross country skiing along the Ottawa River. Usually the only sounds you hear are the crunchy squeaks as your ski poles pierce the hard-packed snow and the swish as your skiis glide along. 

Today though, there was an unusual accompaniment - the steady drone of a helicopter, as it hovered over the area. No doubt it was a surveillance operation, keeping an eye on the truckers' movements. 

I cannot imagine all the coordination and planning that has taken place, among the various police forces. There is the Parliamentary Protective Service, the RCMP,  the Ottawa Police. and the Ontario Provincial Police.  Across the river, we have the city of Gatineau Police, as well as the Surete Du Quebec. Toronto Police vehicles have also been seen. I am grateful to all of them. Imagine being a police officer last night, working outside, in frigid conditions, in such challenging circumstances! Imagine what this has cost all of us, in policing costs!

So, although police organizations could be improved with additional specialized personnel (social workers, psychologists and psychiatrists) to assist at challenging  situations, we cannot afford to reduce  overall funding. This weekend shows how much we rely on well-funded police forces. Thank you to all our hard-working police officers for protecting our city. 

Louise Penny

Well, here in the nation's capital we are awaiting the truck convoy. It is such a ridiculous, scary, unnecessary disruption that I'm not going to comment on it. Instead, I'll write about something positive and that is my enjoyment of Louise Penny's books. 

The last time we went to Parliament Hill was in early January, to see the Christmas lights, on and around the Hill. I love how they use the Parliament buildings as a movie screen, whether it's in the winter or summer.

However, it wasn't just the Parliament Hill display that entertained us that evening. Maybe it's because we just don't go out at night anymore, but I was surprised at the many homes that were still lit up for the holidays. All those lights reminded me of Louise Penny and a short but meaningful paragraph from her novel, A Great Reckoning:

" It was now early January. A peaceful time of year, when the cheery lights and wreaths were still up, but there was no longer the pressure of the season. Their fridges and freezers were full of shortbread and fruitcake and turkey casseroles. Their own form of insulation against the winter."

I enjoy Penny's novels for many reasons, but one of them is her ability to summarize something in such a concise and accurate manner.  "There was no longer the pressure of the season "

She doesn't go on and on about holiday season decisions and shopping and preparations - the endless job lists going through your head  (women's heads?) in December. In a deft manner she simply acknowledges that Christmas brings with it a lot of pressure. 

Another example just jumped out at me, in the book I've just started, Kingdom of the Blind. She writes about a man who is living with dementia. "For the last year of his life he no longer recognized family and friends. He was kindly to all, but beamed at some.They were the ones he loved. He knew them instinctively and kept them safe, not in his wounded head but in his heart. The memory of the heart was far stronger that whatever was kept in the mind."

Penny's husband Michael died in 2016. He had dementia, so her knowledge is first- hand. I love her observation about dementia. When we visit my mother in-law, people ask us how she's doing and if she recognizes us. Penny's description here, is very similar to what we experience. She beams at us. We are still in her heart, if not in her mind anymore.

Most of my reading is done at bedtime. It is a comfortable way to end my days, to snuggle under the duvet and resume my travels to the village of Three Pines, where her novels are set. 

That is not to say that her stories are predictable. She's not on the bestseller lists because she's predictable. These murder mysteries are riveting and entertaining. I love how her characters develop throughout the series. 

To call them murder mysteries is perhaps a disservice They are much more than interesting whodunnits. As Penny herself writes about her books, in the acknowledgements to Kingdom of the Blind,  "They're the common yearning for community. For belonging. They're about kindness, acceptance. Gratitude. They're not so much about death, as life. And the consequences of the choices we make."

To date, Louise Penny has written seventeen books in her popular Inspector Gamache series. If I like her books so much, why am I just starting number fourteen? Well, I am reading them slowly and interspersing them with other reading, so that I always have some of her books to look forward to. I don't want to be up to date. It makes me happy to know that I have four left, plus the one that she just wrote with Hilary Rodham Clinton, State of Terror. 

And so, on these dark winter evenings, I take comfort in the opportunity to end my days with the characters of Three Pines. They're much more admirable than the characters invading our city this weekend. 

I'm Back!

 I wonder how many times I have apologized here, for not writing more often. Who am I apologizing to? Myself? At any rate, here I am. As of January 10th, (after 15 long months) Mom's estate was more or less finalized. There will be some wrap up work in the spring, but that should be fairly straightforward. The worst is behind us. For the past couple of weeks I have enjoyed the lack of emails, meetings and phone calls. Now it is time to get on with my life. Hopefully that will include the usual New Years resolutions - more writing, exercise, piano playing, and reading.