Words of Wisdom from Q

Perhaps I should re-title my blog the CBC fan club? For today I'd like to post a letter which I sent to the radio program Q. I thought it was a particularly good radio day. Too bad I was not near a radio when Jian interviewed Joe Clark. I'll have to listen to that. In my ideal life I will have all kinds of time to sit around and listen to all the great radio I have missed. I suppose I should break down and get an ipod or some such device. Can my small brain learn to operate yet one more electronic gadget?

Anyhow, the letter:

Although I am a huge CBC fan, I must confess that there are some days I think that maybe I’m a bit old  to be listening to some of the items on the radio. After all, many of the musical guests I’ve never even heard of. Yesterday, (Wed. Nov. 20) when I knew I had a big baking/cooking morning ahead of me, I hoped that there were some guests I would really enjoy. I was not disappointed. As is often the case with CBC, even when I am not familiar with the guest, I really enjoy the interview.

Such was the case with Alison Moyet, a U.K. singer. Sorry to say but I had never heard of her. At first I was only half listening but then I became engaged as she spoke of her battles with the music industry and I realized that I was listening to a person of real integrity. As a feminist, who is constantly disappointed with the appearance of young female singers and their young fans, I often feel ancient…like I am not with the program. I felt better yesterday when Moyet too, expressed her concerns when she sees young female singers “more and more undressed.”  “I despair for them.” she said. Moyet hates the examples they set for her daughters.

But it was at the conclusion of the interview, when Moyet was discussing the meaning of her new work, The Minutes, that I really felt like I was listening to a very wise person. She spoke of happiness, our eternal quest. “These glorious times, they only happen in minutes that are suspended in pedestrian years.” She spoke of being in “a great place, middle age, when you are happier to follow your own moral compass.” Although she is a very successful artist, she acknowledged that, ”We are all struggling to find our way.” She is satisfied and feels that “it really is alright that our joy only happens in minutes and we should be grateful for them.” I found those statements to be profound.

Her interview was followed by Torquil Campbell’s rant. Again I was moved by what I heard. He started by declaring this to be a sad time in our country, leaving us all feeling cynical and exhausted. He urged us all to turn away from the cult of celebrity. He advised us to get to know our neighbours, to re acquaint with old friends, to look for our heroes in those around us rather than those in the media. Again, what words of wisdom!

His advice seems to echo The National’s nightly segment, Only in Canada. Kudos to whoever thought that item up. Not only is it interesting to learn of the accomplishments of these Canadians; it’s a chance to celebrate the gifts of people that we usually never hear about. It’s a positive way to end our days.

As usual, thanks CBC. You’re the best!

Toronto's Bully

On the one hand, there is little left to be written about Rob Ford. Hasn't it already been said? On the other hand, I think that he will be written about for years. He is the perfect example for anyone writing about addiction, mental health, bullying, abuse, city governance...just to name a few issues.

I humbly offer a few observations:

Hopefully this whole sorry episode is a wake up call for municipalities across the country to put in place legislation that would provide a mechanism to easily remove a mayor or other elected officials in these circumstances. As Conservative cabinet minister Jason Kenny stated today,"Ford has brought dishonour to elected office." Shouldn't there be a basic code of conduct that elected officials have to follow? Even high schools have codes of conduct these days. If a thirteen year old has to follow certain rules, why not the mayor of Canada's biggest city?

Speaking of thirteen year olds, it is just plain sad that we are all being subjected to such incredibly rude behaviour, especially our youth. This is truly a terrible way to learn the way of grown ups. It was heartening to see the brief interviews done on CBC's the National last week with a few teens. The young kids there, all seemed to recognize that Ford is being totally inappropriate.

However, that was only a very small number of kids. What about Ford's loyal fans? What about the thousands of people across the Greater Toronto Area  ("Ford Nation") who still believe he should be mayor? I was astounded that so many people voted for him in the last election but now I find it downright scary that so many people still think this rude, offensive bully has any place in public life. What do the children and teens in those homes believe?

This morning on CBC radio's Q, Jian Gomeshi interviewed Mariel Hemingway. At one point, when describing her life as a teenager, she stated that she routinely cleaned up her family's dining room after her parents' violent, drunken dinners. She thought little of it at the time. It was simply her reality and she did not realize how far from normal her family life was. Likewise Rob Ford. He has repeatedly said that everyone has problems, that everyone has a few drinks then drives. Last night in the interview with Peter Mansbridge, he talked about blacking out when he was drunk and the way he spoke, "you know, when you black out," it was as if he wanted  Mansbridge to agree, that was the way it was with him too. Drinking, extreme inebriation, has been such a routine part of Ford's life, that he thinks drinking is that big a part of most people's lives. He simply does not recognize that his drinking and many of his other outrageous behaviours are serious problems.

Yesterday's council meeting was unreal. Thank goodness  the local school boards have cancelled school trips to city hall. The yelling was bad enough but the sight of Ford running around the room, totally out of control, going to back up his brother was like watching a really bad reality show. I think of all the anti bullying programs out there and children constantly being told to tell someone in authority if they are being bullied. Here we had a scene straight from a school yard with a bully in charge of the whole place!  

There have been so many negative incidents over the past year and just in the past week, but the saddest sight of all was his poor wife standing beside him at his news conference, with her head hung low. This was not a typical policitial wife, "I'm going to stand by my man"photo, like Hilary Clinton. No, this was someone who had been forced to be there, who could not bring herself to look up, who looked like she wanted to run. If this man says what he says, and does what he does in public, what does he do and say in the privacy of his own home?

For her sake and for all of us, I hope this ends soon.

Birthdays

Today is my son Aaron's birthday! He is the wonderful guy who is responsible for our new verandah that I wrote about in the summer. Of course birthdays are for the birthday people but they are also a day for parents. Lives are changed forever with the birth of a first child.

Aaron might have been born the day before; that's when I was induced. My doctor, a very short man, climbed up onto a little stool and poked me with an instrument that looked like a knitting needle. "There", he pronounced. "That should do the trick. I'm going home now, to start digging a bomb shelter in my back yard." It was the day that Ronald Reagan was elected president of the U.S.

We spent the better part of the morning arguing with one of the nurses about my last name. She declared that there was no way that she could bring a baby to me that did not have the same last name on his bracelet as mine. My identification bracelet was changed three times. At one point, she enquired, "This Knott that you go by...is that your stage name?" Pat confirmed that I was indeed, a Broadway actor.

Later we walked the halls in a circle, trying to encourage labour. Every time we passed the corner room, the woman inside was yelling "Hey!" So every time he heard that, Pat would follow with "Jude." It was a long day.

Of course it all ended in the delivery room with Pat and a team of medical folks. As they all encouraged me to "push, push push", I felt like we were at a football game and I was the only guy on the team.

Yes, that day changes you forever. Happy Birthday Aaron. I love you!

High school reunion

I am sounding like a broken record but, again, sorry for the lack of contact. Real life has a way of getting in the way of my writing life. One recent event was my husband's high school reunion. When such events are organized there are a variety of reactions. Many folks have no desire to see anyone from that period of their lives. Others, such as the organizing committee at St. Pete's in Peterborough, work for a year because it is so important to them. I was so impressed with their effort  that I sent them this letter.

1965  A group of grade nines

Thanks for the Memories

I didn’t attend St. Peters High School. However, on Friday, October 11^th, there I was, along with about a thousand other people, crowding into the current building on Medical Drive as St. Pete’s celebrated its 100^th anniversary. I was there with my husband, Patrick and my mother in law, Rita. Pat attended St Pete’s from 1965 to 1970.

When we arrived from Ottawa on Friday afternoon, Rita expressed misgivings about attending the event. At eighty-eight, she didn’t think she would know many there. We convinced her to come along and it took her all of three seconds to meet someone she knew. I turned around and there she was, hugging an old friend. The entire evening went that way. It was virtually impossible to go more than five feet in the main foyer without her meeting yet another relative, friend or neighbour. Although I did not attend St Pete's, it gave me great pleasure to simply witness her and Pat’s enjoyment of the entire evening. When we told Rita that there was a pub at St. Anne’s parish hall, starting at ten pm, she needed no convincing, so off we went for more socializing.

The sentiment expressed over and over again that weekend was that this reunion at St Peters was simply a wonderful opportunity to visit with people that you might not have seen for a long time and may never see again. While we were in the sixties room, taking in the displays and listening to the great singing, someone looked around at the crowd and remarked that in twenty-five years, most of the people in that room would be dead. Sad but true; life is fleeting. Why not take any chance we have to visit at a celebration, rather than at a funeral home?

I never expected to see anyone from my past at St Pete's. After all, I grew up in Ottawa. What a happy surprise to see Jim and Sharon O. there! Although Pat originally knew them from Peterborough, I remember them as the wonderful couple who befriended us when we lived in Exeter, Ontario in the 70’s.

So, to the organizers who worked for a year to put together this reunion weekend, thank you. The level of organization was very impressive. The parking lot attendants, the current high school student volunteers, the welcoming area, the refreshments, the outstanding displays in the foyer and decade rooms...these all contributed to our enjoyment. Of course the two-sided name tags, complete with graduation dates, were very handy as folks with faulty memories looked first at the face before glancing down to the name tag for confirmation. There were athletic events on Saturday afternoon, a mass in the morning and a dance to finish it all off. I can’t imagine how many hours of work went into such a massive celebration.

The success of such an event can be measured in many ways: by the number of people who had pre-registered by Friday night, by the number of walk in registrations at the door, or by the number of people who attended the various events. In my view the success of the St Pete’s reunion is best measured by the smiles of recognition, the heartfelt hugs, and the long conversations as people reminisced. Perhaps Rita said it best when she pronounced it one of the best events ever held in Peterborough. I’ll always remember the end of the dance and the three of us dancing together, while singing along enthusiastically to  “Wasn’t that a party?!”  Thank you to the organizing committee for the happiness and new memories that you created for so many people.

"A white sports coat, and a pink carnation"  One of the many displays at the reunion!

Harperland Part 2

Well, it's been quite a day... an all day Harperfest! Things started off this morning on CBC radio with an interview on The Current with Paul Wells. His new book, The Longer I'm Prime Minister Stephen Harper and Canada, looks back from Harper's rise to power up to today. It was an interesting interview. Wells asserted that Harper is the most right wing PM we have had in his lifetime, far to the right of Diefenbaker and Mulroney. He said that Harper is such a control freak he never eats in public in case an awkward photo might be taken. He rehearses his speeches over and over, never taking chances, never giving impromptu remarks. Say what you want about Michael Ignatieff but I remember reading that his campaign speeches were often different and he always took questions. Harper, on the other hand, gave the same campaign speech over and over again.

Later, on Q, Jian Gomeshi interviewed veteran journalist Don Newman about his memoir, Welcome to the Broadcast. Again, a very interesting conversation about all kinds of political figures.

The day has been capped off with Mike Duffy's bombshell speech in the Senate. Now I am not about to start the Mike Duffy fan club but really..... at last..... someone is going to be able to show Harper for the person he really is. According to Duffy, Harper was in on the money deal from the start. Here we have a big name Conservative insider telling us how Harper operates. It is confirmation of exactly what many observers have been saying for a long time.  In Duffy's words, there is "unaccountable power in the PMO." To hear such a  totally blunt speech, as opposed to the usual Conservative  message machine is unbelievable.

Today was the political equivalent of a hockey playoff game, near the end of a series. The day has ended with CBC's The National, complete with At Issue and Rex Murphy. Murphy thinks that now Harper "must haul himself out of his surly cocoon." We'll see.

New Wardrobe Item

"What's that smell?" Pat asked. "That would be the rubbing alcohol," I replied. "Why on earth do you smell like rubbing alcohol?" he persisted. " I need it. It's my latest attempt to make this work."

You see, it all goes back to my new wardrobe item. I'll give you a hint. It has to do with a part of my aging anatomy now being officially declared incompetent.

I know what you're thinking. There are so many parts of me that could be declared incompetent. We could start with my brain that has such difficulty remembering names and book and movie titles. What about other body parts? As anyone who has seen me lately might observe...there's a whole lot of sagging going on.

My feet should have been declared incompetent years ago. Now I only wear footwear that will accomodate my orthotics. Even my eyelashes are duds. I scrub them with baby shampoo to keep the blepharitis (crusty eyelids) at bay. And no, this has nothing to do with my hair. My profile photo shows me with the curls that I had for approximately 45 years. It turns out they were hormonal. They arrived with puberty and left with menopause. Nothing remains the same.

Give up? Well the part of me that has most recently been examined are my legs. While they have looked pretty horrendous for years, I never cared because I can't see the back of my legs. They felt okay so I ignored them. However, they've gradually been getting more sore. Around the time we spent five days straight painting all the verandah spindles, in the extreme heat in July, they really made their prescence known. They were all crampy and achy.

I had an ultrasound done and the official diagnosis came back..."venous incompetence". Basically, the valves in my deep veins are not working. Of course this is not a particularly unusual problem. All kinds of people have bad veins and in my case I should not be surprised. My mother has had serious leg problems for  most of her life. One of the doctors who operated on her legs years ago, pronounced her legs the worst in the city of Ottawa. So really, I am lucky that mine have not bothered me much until now.

I should do more reading about it but basically, two of the common suggestions for treatment are to elevate your legs and to wear compression (support) stockings. So, I got a prescription for the stockings and set out to buy them. I chose a pair but the cashier convinced me to buy the next size up. I took them home, put them on and they promptly fell down. Because she had recommended the size change the salesperson agreed to exchange them.

Compression stockings don't look quite as bad as they used to. Yes, they're kind of shiny but I can live with that. I put on my new stockings and they felt good...tight but good. These are a thigh high model with a wide band at the top. On the outside the band looks lacey but on the inside it has a rubber backing. The idea is that the rubber just sticks to the top of your leg.

Well, they did stick and stay up there at first. But after a couple of days I decided I should wash them. Ever since that I have had trouble keeping them up. They start off fine but once I have walked around the house a bit there they are, down at my ankles.

So, I spoke to the salesperson who advised me to wet the rubber band before I put on the stockings. That worked for about 15 minutes. Next I was advised to clean off the rubber band with rubbing alcohol every time I put them on. That would clean off all my dead skin cells and help them to stick better. I cleaned off the offending skin cells but again, down they went. 

And so, later today I am going back to the store. Apparently the last resort is to buy a roll on glue stick, which you apply to your legs before you put on the stockings. 

Maybe this is the real reason that people my age retire. It takes so much time to get ready to get out the door. By the time do your back exercises so you can get out of bed, scrub your crusty eyelids, put your orthotics in the right shoes, put in your hearing aid, glue on your stockings, and cream up your wrinkly skin, it's almost lunch time!

A Happier Note - Culture Days in Ottawa

If you were in Ottawa in 1969 you may recognize this. It's not often we get to see it. Happily, last weekend, Culture Days were celebrated in many cities and towns across Canada. As part of Ottawa's celebration, the National Arts Centre was home to several events.

That lovely collection of colours is a section of the curtain in the NAC's main venue, Southam Hall. I remember seeing it when the Arts Centre opened in 1969 but have rarely seen it since. They simply don't use it much. Most of the time it hangs unseen, way up high above the stage.

For a half hour last Sunday it was lowered and members of the public were invited to see it. Then it disappeared again, so that people could participate in a variety of activities, one being backstage tours. 

It was fun to stand on that stage and see Southam Hall from the other side.

We enjoyed speaking to a carpenter in the props area and viewed some of the dressing rooms, which are pretty ordinary.

Besides the tours there were also free concerts.

These brass players from the NAC orchestra put on a fun show.

Coincidentally, there was another unique event  last Sunday afternoon that was not connected to Culture Days. Heritage Ottawa is an organization that offers guided walks through various Ottawa neighbourhoods. Last Sunday's was downtown, at a couple of parks that we'd never been to. Do you recognize this one?

Give up? Those three photos were taken on the roof of the Rideau Centre! The guided walk was on the rooftop gardens of the Rideau Centre and the National Arts Centre. I certainly did not know that there are three hundred trees growing on top of the shopping centre along with two kilometeres of walking paths. So much for thinking that green roofs are a relatively new idea! (The Rideau Centre opened in 1983.)

From the vantage point of the Rideau Centre garden, tour leader David Jeans pointed out various heriatge buildings. 

The best known of those were the Chateau Laurier and the former train station, now known as the government conference centre.

We then crossed over the Canal 

and onto the gardens of the NAC. While these are not nearly as large as those on top of the Rideau Centre, it was still great to realize that they are there and open for the public to enjoy. 

David Jeans pointed out that the NAC rooftop affords wonderful vantage points for viewing the Canada Day fireworks so we'll try to remember that next July. We finished our afternoon feeling pretty darn lucky to be living here.