Still sexist after all these years

There are days when you just wonder - really, are we still engaged in these same struggles? That thought came to mind today while listening to CBC radio's The Current. Click here to listen to their item on gender-specific toys for children. It's an interesting discussion about how boys, girls and parents choose toys and what part marketing plays in those decisions.

Here's an example for you. I took these photos at an upscale children's store. The actual toy idea is an old fashioned concept - lacing cards. Now you would think that you could simply have one set of cards that would be appropriate for all children. But no, this manufacturer felt it necessary to make one set for boys and another set for girls.

The boys' pictures illustrate great options - superhero, firefighter,  cowboy, pirate or astronaut.

However the "girly" girls only have one active option - a superhero.

Wow, they can twirl!

Daydream - now that's ambitious!

Maybe this is the girls' version of astronaut?

Really - this is all they could think of for girls?
What would recently retired Chief Justice of Canada Beverley McLachlin think of these options?

Today's radio discussion got me thinking about the time I spent at Queen's University's Faculty of Education. It was a year (1975-76) that changed me.That was the year of my engagement, the year that I realized  I didn't have to change my name when I got married. 

Besides engaging in name-changing discussions with classmates and profs,  I took a course about sex role stereotyping in the classroom. It's a subject I had never thought of before. Maybe that's because sex role stereotyping is so subtle and yet so pervasive. It can be a simple statement like, "Can I have a couple of strong boys to help me move these desks, carry these books, etc." Right away the teacher sends out the message that boys are stronger than girls.

Another course that changed me was outdoor ed. I had camped with my family as a kid but I had never been as physically challenged as I was in that course. I'll never forget the day our instructor told us that the guys would carry the canoes on the portage while the women would double pack. I could barely manage to carry my own pack on my back but now I was expected to carry one of the guys' packs in front, at the same time! The old Mary Ellen, the one who had grown up in a house of 4 girls playing with dolls - that Mary Ellen thought she would expire on the spot. It was empowering to realize that my body was totally capable of carrying such a heavy load.

One of the best teaching tools I picked up that year was a terrific music album called Free to Be You and Me by Marlo Thomas. It features Harry Belafonte singing Parents are People, Alan Alda with William's Doll, NFL football star Rosey Grier with It's All Right to Cry, among a great group of songs and stories. Over the years I often used that in the classroom. It helps that the songs are funny, with catchy tunes. However what is much more important is the non - sexist message, the important life lessons. I highly recommend this album for teachers and parents. It's still very relevant and (unfortunately) necessary today.

Maybe it's time for me to pull it out for my grandchildren.

JFK assassination

For those of us of a certain age, this is not just any ordinary day in November. This is November 22nd, the day of the JFK assassination.

I was only 10 when President Kennedy was killed so I can't pretend that I really understood the significance of the event when it happened. What struck me more than anything else that day was the fact that my teachers were actually real people, not just strict dispensers of knowledge who lived at the front of a classroom. In the middle of an afternoon class, my former grade 5 teacher, Miss Rice, walked into my grade 6 classroom wailing, "Isn't it terrible? Isn't it terrible?"` There was no polite knock on the door, no discreet note sent to another room. No, this normally austere woman simply burst into our room, without warning.That was our clue that this was a day entirely out of the ordinary.

Like many boomers, I've followed the Kennedy family's ups and downs ever since then. I was devastated on the morning of my grade 10 math exam,  when my mother woke me with the news that Bobby Kennedy had also been killed. That summer (1968) our family embarked on our longest road trip; across North America to Las Vegas,  up the Pacific coast to Vancouver and finally, a short jaunt across Canada, back home to Ottawa. My parents are saints!

Reading provided me with an escape from the squabbles with my five siblings. At a gas station in Denver I picked up a copy of William Manchester's Death of A President, which I still have.

It's seven hundred and forty-nine pages of tiny print but I dove right in. In fact I remember my mother telling me to "get your nose out of that book and have a look out the window". She was right. At that point we were driving by the Grand Canyon and I've never returned to that area. I should have put the book down and admired the scenery but I couldn't. 

Stephen King has written,  "I was also deeply impressed - and moved, and shaken - by my rereading of William Manchester's Death of a President . . . this massive work, published only four years after that terrible lunch hour in Dallas, is closer in time to the assassination, written when most of the participants were still alive and their recollections were still vivid. Armed with Jacqueline Kennedy's conditional approval of the project, everyone talked to Manchester and although his account of the aftermath is turgid, his narrative of 11/22's events is chilling and vivid, a Zapruder film in words."

A friend recently recommended Stephen Kings novel, 11/22/63.

I loved it as soon as I saw the book jacket. On one side you have the familiar photo of John and Jackie in the motorcade, along with the shocking headline of the day. However, on the back cover you have the opposite headline!

Like the Manchester book years ago, I became totally engrossed in this one. Again, at eight hundred and forty-two pages, this is no light read. It's a time travel affair and I rarely read time travel. The main character, Jake Epping, a teacher, is sent on a mission: to travel back in time to prevent President Kennedy's assassination. Throughout the book we learn all sorts of details about Oswald and his background. The focus is on him, more than on Kennedy. It's a fascinating read. While I was originally attracted to this book because I cared about Kennedy, King is such a masterful storyteller that I ended up really caring about Jake Epping.

The political and historical information that King presented was impressive but what I really enjoyed was the way he was able to re-create the time period. He didn't sugar-coat it. He presented the negatives as well as the positives. What he makes you long for is the slower pace of life, the simplicity of the 50's and 60's, the more personal interactions in daily life. 

 On October 29th, CBC radio's Cross Country Checkup, discussed the question, "Are your changing shopping habits killing the department store and the mall?" Click here to go to that discussion. It was interesting to hear shoppers discuss the closing of Sears and what that means to shopping malls and our shopping patterns. Many listeners lamented the lack of social interaction with on-line purchases. No one knows you on line. No one has a clue about you in the checkout line of a huge store. I refuse to shop at Walmart and hold them responsible for the deaths of so many small independent stores, the demise of so many small towns.

That radio discussion reminded me of one of my favourite sections in King's book. This quote from 11/22/63 gives a nostalgic snapshot of life in the 60's. Here King is talking about the town of Derry, where Jake Epping lives, in the 60's.

"Here's home: the smell of the sage and the way the hills flush orange with Indian blanket in the summer. The faint taste of tobacco on Sadie's tongue and the squeak of the oiled wood floorboards in my homeroom. . . . Other things too. People saying howdy on the street, people giving me a wave from their cars, Al Stevens taking Sadie and me to the table at the back that he had started calling "our table," playing cribbage on Friday afternoons in the teachers' room with Danny Laverty for a penny a point, arguing with elderly Miss Mayer about who gave the better newscast, Chet Huntley and David Brinkley or Walter Cronkite. My street, my shotgun house, getting used to using a typewriter again. Having a best girl and getting S&H Green Stamps with my groceries and real butter on movie popcorn. Home is watching the moon rise over the open sleeping land and having someone you can call to the window, so you can look together. Home is where you dance with others, and dancing is life."

I love the feelings conjured up in that section. When he talks about playing cribbage in the teachers' room I think of my own days in teachers' rooms and the fun lunches we used to have. Now at many schools, teachers rarely bother to go to the staff room.  When they do eat their lunch there, the conversations are limited. Most of the young teachers are bent over their phones, communicating with anyone but the people they are sitting beside. It's a different time altogether.

Thanks to Stephen King for the research, for the compelling story, and for the warm glimpse into days gone by. Earlier this month more than 2800 government documents related to the JFK assassination were released. Maybe, if the remainder of the files are released next year, we'll have an even better idea of why President Kennedy was killed on November 22nd. 

Special Needs Education - Ottawa Citizen Article

As promised, I have written a piece to expand on what I said during the CBC  radio phone-in, regarding the state of special education.  Click here to read  my piece in today's Ottawa Citizen.

In it, I stress the need for early identification of learning problems. Many will disagree, but I also write about my preference for special classes for learning disabled students. In this age of three year olds heading off to full day kindergarten, I also applaud the Toronto Board of Education. They're offering some fall babies the opportunity to enjoy an extra year of school.

There have always been controversies and disagreements about how to best serve our students. As a retired special education teacher, parent and grandmother, I'm happy to remain a part of those discussions.

Special Ed discussion on The Current

We're well into the new school year now. My former colleagues in special education have been working diligently to write IEP's (Individual Education Plans) for students identified with learning  problems.  This fall, CBC radio's The Current has been airing segments about special eduction. On October 2nd the entire show was devoted to the subject. Click here to hear a recap of that show. You would think it wouldn't matter to me anymore; I'm well into retirement. However, just hearing parents' concerns about how their children's needs are not being met, got me all fired up about special ed. again. It's a subject that I've been involved with as both parent and teacher. Frankly I'm saddened by the fact that we are still failing so many students and their families. I was pleased to be a part of the phone-in portion of the show (at the twenty-two minute mark) but there was so much more I wish I could have said. In the next little while I'll re-visit this and elaborate on my comments about early identification and specialized classes.

Goodbye Summer

Well, if it's October, summer must really be over. I don't usually complain about the weather but really -  the weather this past summer was dreadful. It was one of the coolest, rainiest summers that Ottawa has ever experienced. So I have really enjoyed September. It must have been miserable for all the folks working in the heat, after having summer holidays ruined by the constant rain. September is always a treat for us retired guys, but this year it was extra sweet, with the best weather of the summer for sure. What a treat, to swim outside with falling leaves swirling around!

It's not only the weather that improved. Our September visitors had a much easier time getting around  downtown than our July visitors did. Canada Day was advertised extensively and people travelled from far and wide to be here for the July 1st birthday bash. What a blowout that was!

With the threat of terrorism, warnings of long lineups for security and a forecast of rain, we completely skipped Parliament Hill on July 1st. Instead, we went downtown the day before, when the Canada Day rehearsals were taking place on The Hill.

Having lived here most of my life, I've seen a lot of changes in security on Parliament Hill. In years gone by, wherever we had out of town visitors, we would drive them around the Hill and under the archway at the Peace Tower. Those days are long gone. I have never seen anything like this year's security-  so many police officers, everywhere. After having my backpack checked, I entered the security lineup on Wellington Street at Bank St., in front of Parliament Hill. It took about 10 minutes to snake through the metal barricades.

The metal barricades were fairly empty on June 30th

Then I entered the security tent, where we were warned not to take photos. That took another ten minutes. Again my backpack was thoroughly searched. Once I finally made it onto the hill I found that there were very definite entry and exit points.

Specially built exit ramps from Parliament Hill

One of the complaints, after the whole fiasco was over, was that the government kept reporting that they expected seven or eight hundred thousand people to come to Parliament Hill on Canada Day. At the last minute we heard that the actual capacity on the Hill is something like twenty five thousand. Why mislead your visitors? The reduced size of the lawn was evident when I looked around on June 30th. All the media tents were spread out on the west side. VIP viewing tents were on the east side and the stage itself came way out onto the lawn.  Even without the crowds, you could see that the actual standing space was much smaller than in previous years.

This year's stage came way out onto the lawn, taking up viewing space.

VIP viewing tents were new this year

This past week The Ottawa Citizen ran a piece that included many tourists' complaints to Heritage Canada about their Canada Day experiences. Click here to read some tales of total frustration.

Thank goodness our family's Canada Day weekend visitors also visited Parliamen hill on June 30th. They spent Canada Day at parks and sites away from the lineups. My only outing on Canada Day was to the Rideau Canal, to watch a group of canoes paddle past, as they recreated an historic journey from Kingston.

As my mother waited with me, in the  pouring rain, to catch a glimpse of my sister, we saw and heard many helicopters going over the area, probably police surveillance. My mother sadly observed that the terrorists were winning. They had succeeded in scaring  the entire city, on what should have been a joyful day.

After July 1st, things seemed to improve. In mid July, when we were back on the hill for a free musical event,  we didn't have to go through any security but there were a lot of police officers about, all with hands on their guns. On top of the nearby building were more police snipers.

However, then came La Machine, a gigantic robot experience from France. This was the old Ottawa, with crowds all over the place; all of us like little kids, excited to see the dragon and spider as they prowled Ottawa's streets. The crowds were thick. What was the difference? Why were we allowed to freely cram together in such huge numbers for those days and evenings? Whatever the reason, it was a welcome reprieve, after the confinement of Canada Day.

La Machine's fiery dragon

Another huge hit this summer has been the Mosaic garden in Jacques Cartier park in Gatineau, right across the river.  The floral sculptures are fantastic, it's free and just a lovely way to pass an hour on a summer day. It will be missed when it closes in a couple of weeks.

Paul Henderson's winning goal

Mother Earth

There are a few more 150th events coming this year - football (The Grey Cup), hockey (The Outdoor Classic) and curling (Roar of the Rings). Hopefully they will be successful, with no major incidents.   I wish we didn't have to worry so much about security but recent tragic events in Edmonton and Las Vegas remind us that we are living in very challenging times. Regardless of the lineups and frustration of Canada Day, no one lost their life here that day. That's something to be thankful for.

Life Lessons

Once again, it is New Brunswick teen Rebecca Schofield, who has got me back to the keyboard.  I first wrote about Becca in February. She is dying of brain cancer. Instead of thinking only of herself, she launched a campaign asking people to perform random acts of kindness. She loves it when people share their good deeds, using #beccatoldmeto. I was very happy tonight to see an item about her on CBC's The National. Tomorrow in New Brunswick it is Becca Schofield day! Click here to learn more about Becca and to hear part of her interview.

"To know that I get this day and it's not just my day, it's a day to celebrate the people that we can be and the people that we should be — it just warms my heart to know that we have a day like that where we can come together as a community."

Becca's interview reminds me of fifty year old MP Arnold Chan, who died yesterday. I was moved when CBC radio played a part of his last speech in the House of Commons. In it he appealed to all of us, to be our best selves.

"I would ask Canadians to give heart to their democracy; that they treasure it, revere it," Chan said. "Of course I would ask them in the most basic of things, to cast their ballot, but for me it is much more than that. I ask them for their civic engagement, regardless of what it actually may mean, whether it is going out and coaching a soccer team, whether it is helping someone at a food bank, and for me it can be even something simpler than that...

"It is thanking our Tim Hortons server. It is giving way to someone on the road. It is saying thanks.

"It is the small things that we collectively do, from my perspective, that make a great society, and fundamentally to me that is ultimately what it means to be a Canadian."

Click here to learn more about Arnold Chan and to hear his speech.

So tomorrow, on Becca Schofield Day and every day, let us remember the lessons from these two remarkable Canadians. 

Passages

It's the day after labour day, the real new years day. As a retired teacher, mother and grandmother, it will always be this day that marks the end and beginning of the year, the start of new adventures. And so today I am thinking of the passage of time.

Most importantly, today is the first day of real school for our oldest grandchild, our precious Avery. He's very excited for today and we hope that the staff at his school care for him to the very best of their ability. He has been so well prepared for today, over these past five years, by his loving parents.

Last week we visited my mother-in-law, Rita, who has Alzheimers. Time means little to her now. She really does live in the moment and is unable to recognize the change in days, weeks or seasons. However, her emotional sense is intact so she is very much aware of those who make her feel happy, loved and well cared for.

Last week also saw the celebration of my parents' 65th wedding anniversary. As part of our gathering, we played an anniversary quiz game that got them reminiscing about their early years together. They and we, are fortunate that they are able to remember and recount those precious memories. It was fun to hear about their first car,  their wedding day, and the friend who tied all the tin cans to the back bumper of that new car. We are indebted to them for a lifetime of care.

Yesterday we received the sad news that our friend Irene has died. She lived with cancer for ten years. I will always remember her kind welcome to me when I was transferred to her school. I was missing my former school and feeling lonely in my new situation. Her office became a welcome oasis where we shared a lot of laughs. She continued to laugh, love, travel and enjoy life as much as possible throughout her cancer journey. She will be greatly missed.

So, it's a day of beginnings and endings. Whether we are young students starting off in a new class, a patient, a senior, or those of us in the middle, we are all in need of loving care. As the Beatles famously sang,  "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."

I'm Back

Why did I not write for almost two months? At first it was because I was occupied, (being the hostess with the mostess around Canada Day) but then it just got to be a summer habit. I've been thinking of writing, many times but just never sat down to do so.

One of the floral sculptures in Jacques Cartier Park this summer

It's been a busy summer. We've enjoyed visits with out-of-town family and friends here in Ottawa, we've taken in some of the Canada 150 events and we have  mooched a few cottage weekends with friends. This spring and summer we've been to two family weddings and hosted the "after party" for one of them. Time with our grandchildren is always more enjoyable in summer without cumbersome snowsuits. What fun to just sit and play outside in pjs or shorts!

However, it has not all been delightful. Our sandwich generation status has resulted in a fair number of visits to doctor's offices and hospital clinics  with grandchildren, elderly parents and myself. I'm happy to  report that my banged up right hand does not have any broken bones - just had it x-rayed yesterday. Thanks to my great physiotherapist, my left shoulder/neck/back pain  has mostly subsided. It's not terribly effective to swim with a sore shoulder on one side and a sore hand on the other. I'm well aware that my minor complaints are a drop in the bucket, compared to the folks I know who are living with cancer and chronic pain.

Lately I've been thinking about how very grateful I am, to live in this country with such terrific medical care. Whether it is something major, like a friend's stem cell transplant procedure, or my simple hand x-rays  - it is all covered. I hear people complain about the high cost of hospital parking but that is often the only cost involved. We are so lucky! Last week I was in a hospital clinic, watching a plastic surgeon work on my granddaughter's burnt fingers, while a child life worker kept her amused and entertained. The child life worker and the plastic surgeon worked like a well choreographed dance couple as they switched from hand to hand, never letting our little one see the scissors that were used in the procedure. Paying my bill at the parking lot was the least I could do.

You might guess that it's the medical concerns that have affected my mood but it's not only that. It's just hard to have that carefree summer feeling when you pay any attention at all to the news. Just when you think you've heard the very worst, the scariest, the stupidest, the most shameful utterances of any elected official ever, in the history of the human race - it only gets worse. If I feel this worried and concerned now, in the middle of summer, how am I going to feel in the midst of a cold, miserable winter?

All we can do is make the most of any positive opportunities. This week we went to Britania Beach and enjoyed sitting there, reading and watching so many folks taking advantage of such a lovely setting. Out on the water there were plenty of sailboats and throughout the park there were folks of all ages - from new Canadan families to seniors with walkers. I watched an immigrant father walk his two sons into the water. They wore underwear, not bathing suits. The dad was in rolled up pants and a long sleeved shirt. What fun those two boys had, just splashing around in the water. Again, it makes you think: Where have they come from? What have they endured to get here? How will they make out? It made me feel good, just to see them having so much fun. Yesterday we treated ourselves again -  to a picnic lunch in a lovely garden, followed by a swim at our favourite swimming hole.

In the midst of the gloom there are so many joyful moments and so many good people. Throughout our medical encounters this summer, we have met so many cheerful doctors, nurses and caregivers. Right now I'm thinking of my mother-in-law's day nurse, Erin. It doesn't matter whether we contact her in person or by phone, at the beginning or end of her shift, she always has time for us. She, and all the other fine people around us, make life so much easier.

Free Wine ?

For the past few years I have often been accosted while walking near Wine Rack stores in my neighbourhood. At Superstore it happens when I have just finished my grocery shopping. My bags are all packed and crowded into my cart. I just get started, pushing my heavy load and some employee of Wine Rack steps out in front of me with a plastic wine glass in hand and asks,
 "Free wine miss?"

Really? You want me to stop there in the middle of the aisle,  with no family or friends around, no occasion to celebrate, no dinner to eat, just stand there in the middle of a bunch of strangers and drink wine? The idea has always struck me as weird and a desperate ploy to get folks into their store. The same thing has happened in other shopping malls where Wine Rack stores are located. Now they have a store on the main shopping street in our neighbourhood. On several occasions I have seen employees standing up on the nearby bench,  frantically waving the Free Wine sign back and forth, to get motorists' attention. It looks both ridiculous and pathetic.

Many times I have told the salespeople that I totally disagree with the notion of handing out free wine on streets or in malls. When I stated that I thought this was placing temptation right in the path of those trying to stay sober, one employee callously replied, "That's their problem."

That particular sales pitch wouldn't go over well with today's guests on CBC radio's The Current. Click here: The Current, to listen to a discussion on a recent study by The Canadian Institute for Health Information. The study speaks of a looming alcohol crisis in Canada. Today's show featured interviews with Tim Stockwell, the director of The Centre for Addiction Research of B.C. at the University of Victoria and writer Ann Dowsett Johnston. Stockwell said that research shows the link between alcohol consumption and many types of cancer. He also noted that consumption rates increase as alcohol distribution expands and privatization increases. Johnston summarized our culture as having "surround sound advertising". No doubt the free wine offerings are part of that image.  Dowsett spoke of her own experience, living in recovery and what a struggle that is. The last thing she or other people living in recovery need, are people waving free wine signs in their faces.

Click here to read Andre Picard's piece in The Globe and Mail. He makes some interesting points about the harm inflicted by alcohol. He notes that, "When you legalize drugs selectively - such as alcohol and now cannabis - you send an implicit message that they are safer and better. Legalization doesn't magically make a drug safer. The dose makes the poison. The biggest problem with alcohol is that it's overused. Drinking has become the norm in virtually all social settings, rather than an occasional pleasure ."

"All social settings" now seems to include the check out line at my grocery store.

As a confirmation of the harm that just one drink can do, have a look at this segment from CBC TV's The National. The unexpected faces of addiction relates the story of a respected college professor in Vancouver. He was an alcoholic who had been sober for many years, living a happy, satisfying life. On a weekend with friends he had one beer and that was the start of a downward spiral which ended with his death of fentanyl poisoning. Sometimes that's all it takes; just one drink.

How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways

How can we ever count the ways, the reasons why Donald Trump is such bad news for the U.S., for Canada,  for the entire universe? Would we start with his scary war-mongering, his inconsistent and incomprehensible tweets, his total lack of maturity, his unbelievable ego, his boorish behaviour or his complete disregard for the environment?  I often think of a phrase from the election campaign: "He is temperamentally unfit for office."

I've tried not to write about Trump, but an item on Monday night's The National really got to me. Of everything I have heard about this man, this piece on deportations spoke to me the most profoundly. Click here: deportations, to watch. It's about the forced deportations of illegal immigrants in the U.S. Families are being ripped apart as heavy-handed authorities enforce Trump's brand of America. One of the saddest statements I've ever heard is that of a girl named Karen Rodrigues. She looks to be in grade 8. She and her sisters and mother are all American citizens but her father is not. Authorities have granted him permission to stay until her graduation. That poor girl cried as she stated, "He'll be here for my graduation but what about Christmas and birthdays and Thanksgiving? What will we have to be thankful for this year?" I do not understand this cruelty, this short-sighted, mean-spirited policy. I cannot imagine how much damage Trump is going to inflict on everyone, if he remains in power for four years.

Recently Naomi Klein spoke on The Current about how important it is to stand up to Trump. Tuesday night's The National profiled  California's struggle to defy federal authorities' deportation orders and become a sanctuary state.  Stories of struggle, protest and defiance are badly needed to get us through these dark days. As usual, thanks to the CBC.

Life speeds up

Somehow my favourite month is over already. May gets my vote for many reasons: increased temperatures, the promise of summer,  and a variety of fragrant, flowering trees everywhere. After a busy month of family activities, we started off last week with a bike ride to Ottawa's Experimental Farm.

Even on a cloudy day, it's a pleasure to walk among the gardens there.

 As we admired the lilacs, I was reminded of so many past trips to The Farm over the years; with our parents, our children and grandchildren. There's a spot where I remember one of my former work colleagues, Shukri, from Kenya. She assisted my class when I taught ESL to women from Somalia. I took them on their first trip to the farm and they loved it. When we walked among those lilacs Shukri declared, "Tonight I will come back to this spot with my blanket and sleep under this tree."

Tuesday, May 30th was the twenty year anniversary of Peter Gzowski's last Morningside Show.  The Sunday Edition marked  the occasion by airing a collection of clips from the show. This seven minute segment is a lovely reminder of a very special time in Canadian radio. Just listening to that opening theme again filled me with nostalgia for that unique time in my life, in Canada's life. I  count myself as incredibly fortunate, to have had the opportunity to listen to Peter Gzowski's Morningside for most of his fifteen year run. I was home with my children starting in 1980. Gzowski started in 1982. Anyone who has spent years at home with toddlers knows it is challenging in so many ways, not least of which is the lack of adult stimulation.  For those of us feeling somewhat isolated in our homes, as we cared for our little ones, Morningside provided a welcome background to our mornings. We laughed, we learned, we cried, we sang, as he united us and introduced us to our fellow Canadians.

The great thing about the show was that it was a magnificent mix. It wasn't just arts and culture. Camp, Kierans and Lewis provided our weekly political fix. It was a bit of everything and it worked well. We cared for our kids and homes while listening to the entertaining, eclectic mix that was Morningside. In the twenty years since, it has not been matched.

Last week marked another anniversary; fifty years since the release of Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. How could it be fifty years already? I still have my album. One of the cute little ditties on that album is When I'm Sixty-Four. At the time it was released, that song was a cheeky looking- ahead, to an age that seemed almost impossible to imagine, for the Beatles and certainly for me. I was only fourteen at the time. Somehow, last week, I reached that milestone myself. I was happy to mark the occasion with a visit to my parent's home where I picked my favourites, lily of the valley.

Along with these anniversaries have come the recent deaths of a few relatives. In two cases we heard that the families were searching for the funeral plans and wishes. What if, like most of us, they never got around to making plans? This has finally sparked some discussion of our death and dying wishes. It's a subject we have been avoiding. We are a death-denying society for sure. If for no other reason, it is an act of kindness for our families,  to make some kind of a plan. At this point we don't have all the details nailed down, but at least we have started the discussion and made a few basic decisions.

Who knows how long we will have? That's the great mystery of our lives. The fifty years since Sgt. Pepper came out have vanished. Gzowski died just five years after his show finished, at the age of sixty-seven. Stuart McLean, who we came to know on Morningside, died this past year at sixty-eight.

Life seems to be speeding up. It's time to plan. It's also important to make more time for trips to The Farm, for concerts, travel and fun. So for now, we will make those plans, put them away and enjoy the rest of this unpredictable ride.

High and Dry

Looking across to Gatineau, Quebec

We're feeling lucky to be dry. Out of town friends who have watched coverage of the floods in Gatineau and Ottawa, ask us if our basement is dry. Thankfully it is. Actually we have spent the past few weeks working on our basement rec room. Can you still call it a rec room? Anyhow it's the room the grandchildren play in, when they come, the room we retreat to, on a hot summer day. We've been tearing out the old wood panelling and white ceiling tiles, putting in insulation and drywall. Nothing extravagant but an upgrade for us.

When I see and hear these people who have been flooded and lost everything, I cannot imagine how they must feel. This project of ours has taken so much time, energy and money and it's only a small room. How will they clean up their homes and make them liveable again?

Today I went down to the river where I spent so many childhood days. Mom and Dad are still in their home, which is one block from the Ottawa River. Luckily, their basement is also dry. In the sixties, the Ottawa River Parkway was built. That raised road, between the river and my parents' block, helps to keep the water from my parent's block. Here are some scenes from the walking/cycling path along the river.

The signs here, show the location of the walking/cycling path.

The river is now receding, leaving a lot of debris behind.

Ottawa Flypast

Take time to smell the roses...or watch the flypast

There are many perks to living in the nations' capital. Today's flypast was one of them. Canada's Snowbirds, along with France's aerobatic demonstration team, La Patrouille de France, flew together, in formation. It was one of the many events scheduled throughout this year, to marks Canada's sesquicentennial.There were nine Snowbird Tutor planes, eight French Alpha jets along with two photo chase planes. The event was delayed because of yesterday's rain. A crowd gathered at Parliament Hill. We didn't make it downtown but as often happens with Parliament Hill flypasts, the planes were visible in our neighbourhood as we are fairly close to the Ottawa River. The planes fly along the river, on their way to The Hill.

In the midst of a busy morning, with many indoor and outdoor jobs vying for my attention, it was fun to take a break and stand in the middle of Champlain Park with my ninety-two year old father and watch the planes fly overhead.

Earth Day

Happy Earth Day!

While I was teaching, earth day was a major date on my calendar. I was on the environment committee at my schools and dubbed the Green Queen, by one of my colleagues. However, I'm pretty sure that my environment committee updates at staff meetings drove some people crazy. April was a busy month as we planned our earth day assemblies. I have fond memories of earth day songs, activities,  games, prayers, videos and skits...all in an attempt to teach and engage students in environmental issues.

I wish the educational work was over, that the fight had been won, but of course it will never be over. It's now forty-seven years since the first earth day. With the election of the current U.S. President, the environmental agenda has suffered a huge blow. His government's abrupt U-turn on Obama's policies have sparked today's Marches for Science all around the world. Click here The National to see a good recap of the current political situation regarding the environment.

It's encouraging that so many scientists and sympathizers turned out today. The Washington march had a science superstar at the helm. Good old Bill Nye The Science Guy is back. Not only was front and centre at today's march; his new television show,  Bill Nye Saves the World, started yesterday on Netflix. Click here Bill Nye the Science Guy,  to hear his interview on CBC radio's Quirks and Quarks show today.

We need leaders like Bill Nye and David Suzuki and events like today's marches to keep climate change in the spotlight. After that, it's up to all of us, to make environmentally friendly choices in our everyday lives.

I'm happy to report that this week I re-discovered a real gem: The Restore. Restores can be found all across Canada. It's such a wonderful, common sense idea. Stores and individuals donate building materials they can no longer use or sell. Customers can then purchase the donated materials at a fraction of their original cost. All the profits go back to Habitat for Humanity, the charity that builds houses for needy families. It's a win win situation for everyone. From their website: "Retailers often have high quality items that can no longer be sold in store. These items often get sent to a landfill. Donating end-of-line products and customer returns to a ReStore can substantially reduce waste. In 2015, ReStores across Canada diverted over 36,000 tonnes of material from landfills. Individuals can also help to reduce waste by donating items of value that might otherwise be thrown out."

So, if you re-model your kitchen and there's still life left in your cupboards, you can donate them to your local Restore. Here's a kitchen I saw this week at one of Ottawa's two locations.

Unfortunately I didn't think of the Restore a couple of years ago, when we were replacing some light fixtures. I wish we had, because they have an amazing selection. Here's a sample of the tiles available.

            Need a door or window? They are all sorted, measured and well organized.

Click here, The Restore, to learn more. For other environment themed posts you can read my gloomy "The Sin of Bottled Water," from December of last year. On a happier note, there's also my Ottawa Citizen piece about Giveaway Weekend (June 10, 2016)  here in Ottawa. That reminds me, we must be getting close to this spring's version of Giveaway Weekend!

Remember - Reduce, Re-Use and Recycle!

Holy Week - The Sunday Edition

Well, here we are in mid-April already. For Christians, this is the end of Holy Week. For many of us, this week has not felt holy. Rather it could be characterized as a very scary week. Palm Sunday in Egypt saw two churches attacked and many killed. In just one week, Trump has fired missiles at Syria, detonated the largest non-nuclear bomb ever, on Afghanistan and issued combative tweets at North Korea. It feels like we are living on the edge of something catastrophic. How do all the folks who voted for him feel now? Is this what they wanted? It is what many of us feared and what Hilary Clinton meant, when she declared him "temperamentally unfit for office."

If I think about the world situation too long, it's too upsetting and so I try to find something positive, some goodness and perhaps even some holiness in my busy life. We spent last week taking care of our young grandchildren. The opportunity to spend time with them is one of our greatest blessings now.

Yes, it is exhausting work but it's a privilege to be along for the journey, as they develop and discover the world around them. You get to answer profound questions such as,  "Why does Humpty keep falling off walls?" and hear such pronouncements as, "Oh, that's a monster poo!"

A high point for me this week was working on the Easter eggs with my mother. Not many people my age get to walk into their childhood home and work with their mother, who still wants to make Easter eggs for the whole family. It's a family tradition. Her mother started to make them, back when my mother was working in a downtown office. That would be back in the 40's. She made thirty eggs this year. Everyone gets one, with their name on it. If anyone has tried to teach me about goodness and holiness, it's mom.

So often, it is CBC radio that makes me feel better, opens my mind and restores my faith in humanity. 

On March 5th there was a short item on the Sunday Edition that was simply so moving. It's about a book club that takes place in prisons. A former prisoner, Jarrod Shook, recited a poem that he wrote, about his experience with the book club. He uses the phrase, "me the least" to describe himself. It reminded me of a hymn we used to sing back in the 60's. The line is "Whatsoever you do, to the least of my people, that you do unto me." It refers to Jesus' teaching, about the importance of showing love to the "least" among us, the needy, the vulnerable. This young man saw himself as among the least and was so appreciative of the book club. He is now working on his second university degree.

That short item was a welcome reminder that there really are so many good people in the world. Shook's poem is a reminder that all of our actions and interactions matter. We're all in this together. For a short reprieve from our troubled world, for a moment of holiness and hope, click here: The Sunday Edition

Here's wishing for a Happy Easter, a Happy Passover, a Happy Spring!

q at the Junos

It's Juno weekend in Ottawa! Tonight I attended a taping of CBC's show q at The Bronson Centre. After I bought the tickets I wondered if the show would be too young for this grey-haired grandma. It's not like I'm really familiar with many of the Juno nominees. However, The Strumbellas were playing, so that was enough to convince me to buy tickets. Plus, we've always enjoyed the taping of any other CBC shows we've been to.

As we joined the lineup, which stretched around my former high school, I noted a wide age range among the shivering patrons. Clearly the show appealed to many. It was sold out. Age range was made more evident throughout the show. While interviewing Buffy Sainte- Marie, who will receive a humanitarian award at The Junos, Tom Powers reminded the audience that she is seventy-six! After the taping was finished, Powers conducted an informal question and answer session and revealed that he will soon turn thirty.

So yes, this was a show with range for sure. We were not disappointed. It was simply a great evening. It wasn't just that the performers were talented. Yes, they were. However what's often more important for me is what kind of people they are. How do they make you feel? Do they connect with their audience?

Tom Powers set the tone right from the start. He was warm, friendly and welcoming. He admitted to feeling nervous at this, his first live taping of the show. He did a great job. He's a knowledgeable, but down-to-earth interviewer.

I would have gone away happy right after the opening because it was The Strumbellas singing Spirits, for which they are nominated for Single of the year. The interview with band members Simon Ward and Dave Ritter was just lovely. Powers asked about the lyrics of Spirits, and Ward admitted it's not that cheerful; that he wrote it at a time when he was feeling down. He now gets great satisfaction from the song's success and the many positive comments he's getting from fans. His song, written at a low time, is now bringing joy and comfort to many, which continues to lift him up. It was a touching conversation.

My view of the Strumbellas from my balcony seat, right where I used to sit in grade 10.

That was followed by an interview with Henry Burris of the Ottawa  Redblacks and Jim Cuddy of Blue Rodeo. They were talking about the Juno Cup, a celebrity fundraising hockey game in support of Musi-Counts, a music education charity. Again, two really nice guys. 

I won't go through the whole show. You'll have to listen to it. At a time when we're inundated with so much bad news, it was a real pleasure to be part of a show that was just celebrating the positives: good music, good artists, good people. Thanks again CBC!

Winter Wonderland

On Saturday morning I looked out our bedroom window to this!

Isn't it gorgeous? That's not what most Ottawans are saying. All week there's been grumbling:

"When is this winter going to end? 

Enough with the snow already. 

This is supposed to be spring. 

I can't take any more of this stuff.

Don't you just hate this snow?"

 On and on it goes. People are pretty fed up with all our snow. Personally it doesn't bother me all that much. Maybe it's because we had our two week reprieve in Costa Rica. Yes, I'd rather have an early spring but the plain fact is; this is Ottawa in March. Anyone who has lived in Ottawa for more than a couple of years should have resigned themselves to the fact that you can get all kinds of weather in March - wonderful, warm temperatures or the worst snowstorm of the winter. I never count on good weather until mid April.  

For families on March Break, the snow cover was a real benefit. Toboggan hills and ski resorts were probably very busy. Here at our place, Sean took advantage of the snow piled high on our deck and shovelled a toboggan track below it, for the kids.

It was their first real experience of tobogganing and they loved it. It had been many years since we had helped little ones get settled on a toboggan. We loved helping them, as much as they loved the pure joy of flying down the hill.

So, we just have to make the most of this wintery weather. There is nothing to be gained by complaining about it. There are plenty of real problems to worry about: the U.S. president, the North Korean president, all the people we know who are living with cancer or other serious health conditions, the civilians who are dying in Syria. No, this weather is nothing to be concerned about. It's not a real problem. Today we had freezing rain. There will, no doubt, be more snow. This is nothing new - just Ottawa in March.

Screenagers

Last week I went to a screening of a great documentary - Screenagers. It was made by Delaney   Ruston, a doctor with teens of her own. Although the movie is aimed at families with teenagers, I went because the whole issue of screen time is one that concerns me.

This film is only available at community sponsored events. It was easy for me to attend, as it was showing at our kids' former school. I was happy to sit in the familiar auditorium and see that nearly all 700 seats were filled. This was quite an accomplishment. All those parents were concerned enough that they and their teens were out in force on a Wednesday night. How often do teenagers and their parents attend a movie together?

Screenagers is well worth seeing. It's not preachy but informative and entertaining. Here are some of the ideas mentioned in the film:

Self control is the main issue. How much self control do kids, teens, and adults exercise when it comes to screen time? How much are we all sucked into more, more, more?

On average, teenage boys play 11.5 hours of video games a week. They profiled one family where the son became totally addicted. He eventually went to Restart, a rehab centre for screen addiction. One concern with video games is the effect of repeated violence. Another is the fact that a sense of empathy is diminished with increased game time.

A new digital divide was explored. This is not the divide between those who have devices and those who don't. No, this new digital divide is about how devices are being used in homes of various economic status. In homes where parents are absent or too busy, kids are using all sorts of electronic devices with absolutely no supervision or adult guidance. In homes where parents have more time and education, their kids' online activities are being restricted and closely monitored. That monitoring makes all the difference. With screen time and everything else - kids will succeed if they have boundaries set by loving parents.

As in all aspects of parenting, easier said than done. In the movie, the doctor tried to impose a five page contract on her daughter when she got a new cell phone. It included important rules like no technology in the bedroom. (Lack of sleep in teens is a major issue.) By the end of the movie, the rules in the contract had been adjusted. Parents' rules always have a better chance of success if they are explained, discussed and justified by the parents.

Here's the catch with all the screen time rules a parent may want to set. How are kids going to follow any of these rules if parents themselves are constantly glued to their own devices? What kind of example are we all setting for our kids and grandchildren? The movie closed with a question meant for all of us, at any age - How can we maintain balance between our screen time and other activities, throughout the day?

For more information on Screenagers click here. If it plays at a school or community centre near you, it's well worth attending.

Costa Rica

After a couple of lovely weeks in Costa Rica, we're back in the land of ice and snow. It's been a long time since we had such a restful vacation. The warmth, the flowering trees and the ocean swims were all a wonderful reprieve from the dreariness of winter. It was our first time in Costa Rica and we enjoyed it as much as others had predicted.

The only hard part of the trip was the flight.  I was the guy sitting in the middle. As usual, I had difficulty with the buttons on my seat and never did get it reclined. The guy in front of me had no such trouble. He had his seat rammed back pretty well into my lap so I had a perfect view of his Major League Bow Hunter baseball cap. Now I'm not into hunting or shooting but I was not thinking pretty thoughts about him as I struggled to be comfortable for the five hours. It was such a tight fit that by 10:15 I had pain running down my right leg. I simply had to bother the person seated on the aisle and get up and walk every hour or so. If I could have stood for most of the flight I would have. However, the aisles are too narrow for that.

Our airline sent an email a few days before the flight, promoting their pre-flight meal sales. That would guarantee our first choice for meals so I decided it was a good idea. We left Toronto at 9:15 am, on a 5 hour flight to San Jose. At 9:45 our names were called and it was to deliver our meals! We had just eaten a breakfast sandwich at Tim Horton's in the Toronto airport so I squashed my ham and cheese sandwich into my carry-on bag, under the seat in front of me.

I had been looking forward to watching a movie to pass the time but there was nothing remotely interesting on and the satellite tv was unavailable. The most interesting channel was the one where you watch your plane fly across the map. Actually the best visual was looking out the window as we passed over the Florida Keys. Thank goodness for our books!

About noon I bent down and fished my warm sandwich (so glad I pre-ordered) from my bag. Space was so tight that when I bent down, my face was pretty well resting on my neighbour's knee.
As I chewed through my warm sandwich I thought back to airline travel of years ago. Flying was sort of glamourous then. People got dressed up to fly. There were real meals, good meals, served on real plates with real cutlery. I even remember being handed a hot wet facecloth to use after dinner! The only freebies on these flights  were a tiny bag with about eight corn chips in it and a glass of ginger ale.

Enough with the complaining already! One of the best aspects of our holiday was the people. Certainly the Costa Ricans were gracious and very hospitable. Our hosts at hotels and bed and breakfast places, the tour guides on hikes, the taxi drivers who could speak English, even the drivers who couldn't speak Engish - they were all eager to show off their country and to make us feel welcome and comfortable.

We weren't surprised by the warm welcome given by the Costa Ricans. Everyone had told us they would be great. A pleasant surprise was the fun we had meeting so many other travellers. In restaurants, on buses, on guided hikes and while sitting around at our last cosy hotel, we met folks from all over the world. For the most part they were pretty friendly. It was February, not March break, so travellers fell mostly into two age ranges: the twenty/thirty year olds and fellow seniors. Both groups were equally friendly. It didn't seem to matter to the young travellers that we were gray haired. We were all in the same boat and the questions were often similar:

Is this your first time in Costa Rica?
Where else have you travelled in Costa Rica?
What did you do there?
What do you recommend...for a place to stay, a place to eat, activities and guided hikes?

We all shared and traded information that was immensely helpful. Just as I don't appreciate it when people judge me by my gray hair, I need reminders myself, not to judge others by their appearance. I was thinking about that one day at the back of a bus, bumping along the roads in the mountainous Monteverde region. We were returning to the small town of Santa Elena after a morning spent at Selvatura Park. We had enjoyed a spectacular hanging bridges walk through the cloud forest, a guided tour of their butterfly garden and their hummingbird area as well.

We found ourselves sitting beside an elderly couple from the Netherlands and a young couple from St. Louis, Missouri. In another situation we might not have spoken with the young black man from Missouri. He and his partner had tattoos running up and down their arms, he wore a thick chain around his neck and a ball cap on backwards. But at that particular moment we were all in the same boat, or bus. We had all enjoyed a pretty wonderful place and the six of us had a fun conversation as we bumped along the horrendous road back into town. The young couple couldn't have been nicer and I gave myself a mental reminder not to judge people so hastily.

On our last Saturday in Costa Rica we signed up for a boat ride to look for dolphins and do some snorkelling. We did see some bottlenose dolphins and admired their synchronized swimming. We also saw a pair of mating olive ridley turtles.

However, the lasting impression that I have of that morning is the feeling of contentment among fellow travellers and gracious hosts. We were picked up at our hotel and as we clambered into the back of the truck and sat down on a bench we were introduced to our fellow participants. There were about a dozen of us - folks from Italy, France, Holland and the States. Our guide, Alex, hung on while standing at the back of the truck.

As we drove along the beach to meet our boat it just seemed like such a perfectly peaceful moment. No technology, no seatbelt, no jobs to do - just a bunch of people going for a boat ride on a beautiful summer day. When it was all over and we had handed in our snorkelling gear, we sat in the boat, dripping wet. These guys - the captain and the two guides, were not in a hurry to get rid of us. The music was turned on, drinks were passed around and Louis impressed us with his great fruit carving skills. We all sat there eagerly grabbing slices of fresh watermelon and pineapple, juice running down our faces.

And so we are back. We're so glad we had the opportunity to explore a new country, to unplug from everyday stress and to meet people from all over. My questions is - How can I bring any semblance of that feeling, of that relaxation, into my regular, day to day life?